A school photo that's got me thinking

 

I was recently sent this photograph by my former history teacher at Cwmcarn Comprehensive School, “Mr Jones”. He’s not sure when it was taken but having shared it on Facebook, with a  group of former students, the feeling is that it might be from June 1979. If so, I was aged 15. I’d be 16 the following October. Several of us in the photo are wearing small yellow badges signifying we’d just been made Prefects. You can’t see my badge  but mine says that I’m Head Boy.

By the way, I’m the one in the middle with the rather strange side parting. (Was I hoping this might develop into a haircut that would later be adopted by 1980s synth pop band a Flock of Seagulls? Or possibly Phil Oakey from Human League? There’s no other explanation for it.)

I recalled most of the names in the photo and Facebook has filled in the blanks. Not everyone in the photo is a prefect and we aren’t all in the same form group – 4R. But most in the photo are from 4R. (The tutor group I’d been with since my second year at secondary school.) Mr Jones was our form tutor at the time.

Through social media I’m in touch with many of the people in this photo but there are some that I’ve lost contact with. Particularly two of the “girls” who were in 4R. (The dark haired girl seated who was Head Girl – note the shield badge -  and the girl on the right behind the then on trend Adidas sports bag.) Some in the photo I’ve met in person  over the years at school reunions, and one took the trouble to come and see me when I was ill; an act of kindness I’ve not forgotten. 

One of the “girls” – “Debbie” - purposely doesn’t do social media but we’ve kept in touch for over 40 years through old fashioned letters and phone calls.  She’s seated at the front.

It is a friendship which means neither of us will speak or be in touch with the other for months, then out of the blue Debbie might send me a card or a letter or vice a versa. Or we might end up having an hour long chat on the phone. 

I don’t usually keep cards and letters but I do have one Debbie sent I think a couple of years ago. Inside the card is a message “So blessed you’re in my life”. And Debbie had written “This card struck me as perfect as you must know how much I value your friendship … my only entire  life thread connection that extends right back to our 12 year old selves. I know you’re in touch with many but you are my only contact from then. I find it very comforting”. Very humbling.

Back to the photo. Looking at it has made me think back.

I expect you’ve come across the idea, perhaps in a newspaper column “What would you say to your younger self”. I’ve been thinking about that, looking at this photo. I know my younger self would be surprised that he’s now a Superintendent Methodist minister. My younger self had dreams of becoming a lawyer. He just about scraped through enough “O” levels and “A” levels to get to further education and get a law degree. After that the wheels came off the legal dream.

I’d certainly tell him that just because they’ve made you Head Boy doesn’t mean you can’t study hard! (See the previous paragraph.) Likewise I’d tell him “Yes you do go to chapel on a Sunday, and you do help with Sunday school, l but that doesn’t mean they will gift you your “O” level RE.” (Yes, the irony that I am a Methodist minister with a degree in theology who failed his “O” level RE.)  I’d definitely say to him (or probably the 14 year old about to select O level options) “If you want to study geology instead of Latin do it. Study the things that interest you. Not the things others tell you you ought to study. ”

I know the 15 year old had a crush on several of the girls in the photo (and others not there) but despite his seemingly out going confident exterior he was always shy underneath and never had the nerve to ask a girl out on a date. Would I tell him to “go for it”? Maybe. Then again, the 18 year old in sixth form and the 21 year old at university  was much the same, apart from somehow getting the courage to ask out the woman who is now my wife.

Thanks for the memories Mr Jones.

 

 

My body given for you my blood shed for you

 Based on a sermon preached 18th August 2024 

There are a number of reasons why I entered ordained ministry. But the most important probably is a sense of wanting to share communion. I can’t pinpoint when I sensed this, but I know that near the time I started the process of offering for ministry, I’d attended a communion service and seen the minister giving communion and felt this is something I wanted to do.

Now inevitably this begs the question “Why is it that only ministers can serve communion?” Or to be precise in the Methodist Church only presbyters. So why is it? It is a good question, and I cannot give you a definitive answer really. Though 2000 years of church history show that within a short time after Jesus’ death, the early church recognised that communion should be led by someone who had been ordained to that role.

The Methodist Church is no different in that sense. Our standing orders make clear that within Methodism there are two distinct types of ministries – Deacons and Presbyters. I am a presbyter, and a presbyter is “a person ordained to the ministry of word and sacrament”.

Communion is important to me both as a presbyter and as a person. Thanks to the plan, I lead a communion service nearly every week. And as such I take communion every week. John Wesley would approve. He celebrated communion at least once a week and if possible, every day. Though for me leading communion, celebrating communion is not the same as being given communion by another minister. That feels very special.

During my sabbatical it seemed to be that of the Sunday services we attended, in different places, everyone was a communion. We experienced a very simple service at Cirencester Baptist Church, and we experienced the full High Church Anglican communion complete with incense at Southwark Cathedral in London. And lots in between. All different but all special for me.

By the way, I tend to say “Communion.” It could be the Lord’s Supper. It could be Eucharist. It could be Mass. It is all the same in essence – setting aside the variations in liturgy depending on church tradition. I say “Communion” for it is a word suggesting a coming together, being in fellowship, a uniting. Communion with one another but most importantly with Jesus.

Today we’ve heard a reading from John’s Gospel. It comes at the end of chapter 6 and in a way the whole of chapter 6 is John’s take on the Last Supper. Unlike the other three Gospels John doesn’t specifically mention the Last Supper. But in this chapter, there are plenty of references to it and also to communion. For example, at the start of the chapter we have John’s account of the feeding of the five thousand. And John tells us:

¹¹ Then Jesus took the loaves, and when he had given thanks, he distributed them to those who were seated; John 6:11 NIV

Words that are reminiscent of the words in the Last Supper accounts. For example, in Luke 22

¹⁹ Then he took a loaf of bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, Luke 22: 19 NIV

For much of the rest of chapter 6 John shows how Jesus then talks about him being the bread of life. Then in the passage we’re thinking about Jesus goes on to say this:

⁵³ So Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. ⁵⁴ Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; John 6: 53 - 54 NIV

It’s worth stopping there for a moment and reflecting on Jesus’ words., “unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you.”

We’ve heard these words many times. We know we are not literally eating Christ’s body and drinking his blood. The words are symbolic. They were a reminder to the earliest disciples and us that Jesus went to the cross for us. He gave up his body, his own flesh and shed his own blood, so that if we believe in him, we will have eternal life.

A few years ago, now one of the churches I looked after in Swindon had quite a number of small children. Grandchildren of church members. It was accepted that the children could come up for communion and receive bread and wine if their grandparents were happy with this. On one occasion a little boy – I’ll call him Stephen – came up with his grandma. It was the custom there for the congregation – maybe about 15 in all – to form a semi-circle at the front. I’d take the bread round and once we’d all received, we’d eat it. I gave Stephen the bread and he looked around, couldn’t see anyone eating and so I saw him put it in his pocket.

Afterwards a lady came to me (I'll call her Phyllis) and said it was disgusting what Stephen had done. He shouldn’t be allowed to receive communion as he clearly doesn’t know what’s going on. I said to her “Phyllis. Can you tell me what is going on in communion? I don’t mean the symbolism. What is really going on? The mysticism of it. I can’t.”

So what is going on? Firstly, we have communion to remember Jesus. In one of his 44 sermons The ways of obtaining God’s blessing – the means of grace John Wesley said communion, the Lord’s Supper, is a solemn remembrance.

The celebration of the Lord's supper is a way of commemorating his death in the presence of God and the angels, and mankind, by means of visible symbols. You show that you are solemnly remembering his death until he comes in the clouds of heaven.

But it is much more than that.

A few years ago, the Methodist Church produced small booklet called “The Methodist Catechism”. It contains a summary of what Methodists believe. Our theology. The booklet says:

In the Lord's Supper Jesus Christ is present with his worshipping people and gives himself to them as their Lord and saviour.

As they eat the bread and drink the wine, through the power of the Holy Spirit, they receive him by faith and with Thanksgiving. They give thanks with the whole Church for Christ’s sacrifice of himself once and for all on the cross.

The Lord's Supper recalls Christ’s Last Supper with the disciples. It proclaims Christ’s passion, death and resurrection, unites the participants with him so that they are a living sacrifice in him, and gives them a foretaste of his heavenly banquet.

So now you know! All that is going on when you receive bread and wine. No wonder Phyllis was for once lost for words when I challenged her!

But in fairness to Phyllis, she did sort of have a valid point. For John Wesley in that sermon I’ve mentioned says that when we come to the communion table we must:

“… firstly, ask ourselves whether we understand the purpose of this ritual, and whether we really want to share in the death of Jesus, before we join in breaking bread.”

Of course do we really understand what's going on? 

Wesley goes on to say that we need to remind ourselves that we are sinners. We aren’t worthy. That we are to die to sin and that also as followers of Christ we are called to take up our own crosses.

Nonetheless despite this Wesley says, we come to the table filled with joy and peace for we know that we are forgiven. And Wesley says.

“The Lord's supper is a way planned by God for us to receive his grace.”

Wesley continues:  The eating of that bread and the drinking of that cup are the outward and visible means by which God pours into our souls all the spiritual grace of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit which were purchased for us by the death of Jesus on the cross. So let all of us who truly desire the grace of God eat that bread and drink from that cup.

Communion, the Lord’s Supper, Eucharist, whatever we call it is also a reminder to us that Jesus says;

⁵⁶ Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them. John 6:56 NIV

Through this bread and this wine, we are made one with Jesus.

More than that; eat the bread, and we live.

⁵⁸ This is the bread that came down from heaven, not like that which your ancestors ate, and they died. But the one who eats this bread will live for ever.’ John 6: 58 NIV 

Eat this Bread and you will live, he promises. But even more than that, eat this Bread and I will abide with you, and you will abide with me Jesus says.

I like that word abide. Abide is an old-fashioned word but it is a comforting word. It suggests images of home, of dwelling, of staying with, of living in and with, of trusting and being there. To abide is to know that no matter what comes our way, we will not be deserted nor left to face whatever the matter is on our own. Christ comes to live within us, to take up residence in our spirits, and promises not to leave.

Whatever your intellectual, emotional, theological, or spiritual experiences with Holy Communion, I pray this sacrament will continue to be for you a holy, life-giving, mysterious magnet, drawing you ever closer to the love of God. God who sent his son that we might never be hungry nor thirsty; this day, tomorrow, and forever and ever.

 

If we see love we see God

 

One of the questions my director Jeff asks me from time to time is “how are things with you and God?” And I answer truthfully. A bit distant. I feel close to Jesus; from time to time, I sense the Holy Spirit and see the Holy Spirit at work in others. But God? God is distant.

Of the three persons of the Trinity, God is the most distant for me. If we think of the Holy Trinity as a triangle, then it is a very narrow pointy one for me, with Jesus and the Holy Spirit at the bottom corners and God a very distant top one. I’m near those bottom points.

Jeff keeps picking away at this point with me. In fact, I know he'll ask about it when we meet back up in a few weeks.

When over a year ago now I was told I was due another sabbatical, and started to think of a title / objective, I knew it had to be about finding God. But how do we find God? It's a point I raised with Jeff. Between us we agreed that God is everywhere, and God is in all situations. It's just a case of being aware, and perhaps purposely looking for God.

Jeff said to me “Have you ever found yourself in a strange town with a letter to post.  It's a strange area but if you purposely go around looking for a post box you will find one. Therefore, I suggest if you purposely go looking for God, seeing signs of God, you will find him and them.”

Of course this brings up some big questions. How do we see God? How do we know God?

In 1 John 4 we get some really helpful guidance and pointers.

Verse 16

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

The key point of this verse is God is love.

With this in mind I started to get an idea of what I wanted to think about on my sabbatical. Looking for signs of God through a camera lens. In other words, while on my travels looking for examples of God's love in the world. And if possible, capturing that in a photograph.

I didn't need to look too far for the first sign of God's love. I live with a sign of God’s love all the time and have done so for almost 38 years of marriage. In the six weeks we were away, we spent 42 days together that's 1008 hours together all the time. Well not quite all the time - we didn't do everything together!

But my point is we spent a lot of time in each other’s company. And God’s love was there right next to me.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

But what signs of God did I see outside?

I kept remembering Jeff’s post-box analogy. In other words, we'll see God's love if we look for it.

I got a reminder of this in the words of a book I read during sabbatical. Perhaps surprisingly it wasn't some great theological tome. Rather it was in a crime novel I picked up in an Oxfam shop. It was a novel written by Robert Galbraith - the pseudonym of JK Rowling. The book was called “Career of evil.” You may think it would be hard to find words of advice on looking for God in such a book. But in the book the detective - Cormoran Strike – says to himself “You can find beauty nearly anywhere if you stop to look for it.”

I took this to mean that in the beauty we can find anywhere, if we stop to look for it, we will also find God’s love.

One of the first expeditions I made to go and seek signs of God, was to Bath. And I didn't have to wait long. I was sat outside a Costa Coffee near the entrance to the Roman baths. A busker was playing the trumpet and he started to play “What a wonderful world” the song made famous by Louis Armstrong. It is a song I have always liked even from a being a small boy.

A few moments later, as the busker carried on playing, a little girl perhaps three or four came skipping down the street holding the hand of a lady who I assume was grandma. Grandma and the little girl were giggling, and grandma was singing Lou Lou skip to the Lou skip to the Lou my darling. There was a sign of love in the joy of the little girl and in the smile on the grandma's face.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

I have no idea whether grandma and granddaughter know God. Nor the trumpeter for that matter. But God knows them, and God's love is in them as God's love is in us all.

I'd identified certain places I wanted to revisit on our travels as they had some significance for me in my faith journey. Therefore, our itinerary made sure we went to these places.

I believe Yorkshire people refer to their county as God's own country. I've always thought this a bit presumptuous. When we all know that Wales is God's own country. Even so Yorkshire has played a part in my journey of faith. It was at Ripon cathedral I first felt the call to preach back in 1991. My “John Wesley heart being strangely warmed moment” I suppose. We revisited the cathedral this time and I sat roughly where I thought I'd sat that day back in 1991 and said a prayer. A prayer of thanks for being called to this ministry and a prayer asking for God's help as I continue it. But I can't say I felt God's presence particularly strongly in that place.

Earlier that day we'd been to Fountains Abbey. It is a beautiful tranquil place. And thinking of those words said by Cormoran Strike again, “you can find beauty nearly anywhere if you stop to look for it” God was certainly there. But all I could think of as we wandered around the ruins and the beautiful grounds, was how the vision of the 13 monks from Saint Mary's in York who had established this place in 1132, had been lost. They had purposely left the extravagant and rowdy living of the monastery in York, seeking to live a devout and simple lifestyle elsewhere. To be closer to God.

But over time the Abbey became rich off the back of wool production, lead mining cattle rearing horse breeding and quarrying. All from lands given to the Abbey. And although the fortunes of the Abbey were reduced due to the Black Death, and raids from the Scots, money was still found to build the magnificent buildings we see in ruin today.

I couldn't help but feel that those original 13 would have despaired to see how their vision was lost. How God may have become more distant.

But if I did not glimpse God in the buildings of Ripon and Fountains Abbey, I kept glimpsing him at work through people.

In the love shown to us by friends we visited in the Lake District. Friends who took us out for a very nice lunch as their treat. The same friends who were incredibly supportive in all manner of ways as we entered ministry. The same friends who in fact prompted me to offer for ministry - even though it took five or six years for me to answer God’s call.

And we saw signs of God in friends we caught up with in Scotland. Signs of God through the love one shows to the other as he cares for her.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

If I didn’t see signs of God in Ripon Cathedral or Fountains Abbey there were two other places, we visited where I saw signs of God and felt his presence.

Firstly, on Iona. This was the third time I have been there as an adult and as before I found it to be “a thin place” where God is very present. Within half an hour of us being there I had an experience of God’s love that I cannot put into words. I suppose a sense of being humbled but also a sense of being loved and a sense of joy and peace.

And in Iona Abbey on Sunday morning, I had an experience of being part of God’s family like never before as with several hundred others I received communion.

I must say communion featured a number of times during my sabbatical in all kinds of ways, from low church at Cirencester Baptist. to very High Church at Southwark Cathedral. And I sensed God in each one.

And it was at another communion service this time at Malmesbury Abbey that God’s love was shown. The church was busy – there was a large Christening party as well as usual worshippers. Yet before the service one of the priests came over to us and said ”You’re visitors, aren’t you? Welcome”. And during the communion the other priest when giving us the bread and wine said a prayer for us both.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

In small Northumbrian village called Warkworth we went into the pretty parish church of St Lawrence. But I was immediately stuck by God being there and his people following him. They support a foodbank in Newcastle, they’d just been awarded Bronze eco church status no mean feat for such an old church. And from the large poster in the entrance vestibule, they have a very active Messy Church for children.

So, what have I learned? What do I bring back into ministry?

As I was putting these thoughts down on paper the Bible passage from John’s Gospel came to mind particularly these verses:

⁷ If you know me, you will know^[d] my Father also. From now on you do know him and have seen him.’

⁸ Philip said to him, ‘Lord, show us the Father, and we will be satisfied.’ ⁹ Jesus said to him, ‘Have I been with you all this time, Philip, and you still do not know me? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father.

I’ve realised that I have been beating myself up about not knowing God, about not seeing signs of God. I’ve realised that in speaking to Philip, Jesus made it clear – if we know Jesus, if we have “seen Jesus”, if we have experienced his love, then we have “seen God” we have experienced God. For God is love. Love most evident in his son.

Over this last couple of weeks we have seen plenty of hatred directed by racists thugs intent on causing trouble. You may have an opinion on the rights or wrongs of offering homes to refugees and asylum seekers. But I hope you’d agree that the actions of these mobs is wrong. They are trying to get their point over through criminality and terrorism. That is just evil.

Yet  “you can find beauty nearly anywhere if you stop to look for it.” One such moment was a photo I saw of an elderly Muslim gentleman, the morning after a riot, taking tea and biscuits to weary looking police officers.

In Southport people came out the next day to clean up the streets, Builders came and rebuilt the wall of the mosque.

In Middlesborough a man originally from Nigeria, Brendan Nwabichie who is working as a carer while he puts himself from university. Brendan Nwabichie returned from a 12-hour shift to find the car he needed for work and to get to university had been burned out by rioters. He said he "went to the bathroom and cried".

A fundraising page set up by his employer, Clare's Care UK, has raised more than £37,000 for a new car.

In Liverpool a fundraiser launched by a lady called Alex McCormick, to help rebuild the library destroyed by rioters has so far raised over £200,000.

A Scottish Baptist minister called Oswald Chambers said this:

God and love are synonymous. Love is not an attribute of God, it is God; whatever God is, love is. — Oswald Chambers

If we see love, we see God.

UK civil unrest August 2024

 In the images you will find a letter I've written today to the churches in the North Wiltshire Methodist people.