On 6th January this year I conducted the marriage of Hayley and Will Tsang. The wedding had come about through the generosity of the people of Swindon and because Hayley wanted the marriage to take quickly to enable her father, Gary Savory, to be there to walk her down the aisle. Gary was suffering from terminal cancer.
Sadly, on 1st March, Gary died at home and I was hugely honoured when the family asked me to conduct the funeral.
The local press had been following the story since the wedding and they were at the funeral - with the family's permission - yesterday. You can see the report here. http://www.swindonadvertiser.co.uk/news/11076416.Farewell_as_doting_dad_seen_off_with_a_blast_of_reggae/?ref=mr
Inevitably the newspaper report doesn't really capture what I said at the funeral so I'm sharing an abridged version, in the hope that people will be able to take comfort from my words:
Outside the window of my office are some bushes. What kind of bushes they are I can’t tell you, as we’ve only been in the house about 3 weeks. But in that three weeks I’ve noticed a change come about. In the middle of February they had a dead look of winter but now – following the sunshine of last weekend - they are starting to come in to leaf. It is almost as if the bushes need to be greeted by warm sunshine to enable them to grow.
Love is to a child what sunshine is to a flower. The experience of being loved as a child gives us something that no amount of money can buy. Love gives us a warm feeling about life. The love of parents and the love within a family enables us to feel good about ourselves and for us to grow – physically and emotionally.
God is love and God entrusted the important task of passing on love through our parents. It is from them that we got our first and most important experience of love. Parents don’t have to be clever, or talented or rich. All they need is a warm heart.
(At this point I shared Gary's life story with the congregation.)
I suppose all of us here today must be thinking “It’s not fair that Gary died at 53”. I’d include myself in this. It isn’t fair. And it is a question Christians constantly try to find an answer to. How can God who loves us allow suffering? There is no answer. It is one of life’s mysteries.
Earlier I read a passage of scripture from an ancient part of the Bible called Ecclesiastes. (Ecclesiastes 3: 1 - 8) You may know the words if you’re familiar with 1960s pop music, as The Byrds had a hit single called “Turn turn turn” which used these words.
The Bible passage is a poem really and what the poet was trying to get over was the message that although we may not understand it at the time, things happen at the right time and for a purpose. This can be hard for us to accept – especially when we are gathered for the funeral of someone we knew and loved.
And yet Hayley, in the words she asked me to read on behalf of the family, hit upon something
Dad when you came back in our lives, it felt you hadn’t ever been away, it was meant to be, you made us complete. I know you never wanted to leave us again, it doesn’t seem real, it doesn’t seem fair. I’m so grateful for the years we had with you. You’re no longer in pain and now at peace,
The time was right for Gary to come back into the family and for the family to be complete again. It isn’t fair that Gary developed cancer and it isn’t fair that he died at 53 he died before his time we may think. But death came at the right time to free Gary from his pain and suffering.
What Gary has taken with him, from this life into eternal life, is the knowledge of the love that surrounded him. The love of his family, but also the love of all of you here today. But most of all I believe that in death Gary would have known the greatest love of all – the love of Jesus Christ. A love that promised that those who believe have nothing to be afraid of in death for they have the promise of eternal life in heaven.
God is love, and those who live in love live in union with God and God lives in union with them. 1 John 4:16
God bless you Gary. Amen.
Photograph from Swindon Advertiser
No comments:
Post a Comment